Tuesday, February 23, 2010
This is how I check to see if Pebble is sleeping. With covert surveillance! Loathe to move her in case she is not yet quite asleep, and then disturb her, I sneak up from behind. I love my expression in this pic. There’s something of a threat in my eye . Or just plain desperation, perhaps.
The only way I can get to my computer keyboard to write more than a sentence, is to stand at the kitchen bench in front of the lap top, with little Pebble in the sling. Except, of course, for the rare times that she does sleep away from my body during the day, and if that happens you can be DAMN sure I’ll be sleeping too.
Don’t get me wrong here. My heart is full of love for this little bundle, and I lap up the cuddles as much as I can, because before too long she’ll be oh so big and I’ll wonder where my baby went.
Tomorrow the two of us are headed off to the local Child and Youth Heath office for some observation and hopefully some support with feeding and settling. We are still struggling with breast feeding. Sometimes it’s awesome, and sometimes Pebble is all about the screaming and frustration and pulling away. I’ve no idea why this happens, I can’t see a pattern to it, but it’s distressing for both of us. We’re still using formula top ups at night, to make sure that I get more than a half hours sleep at a time.
Still, things could be worse. My heart goes out to my friend who’s little girl is less than a week old and has had to return to hospital to sort out some real feeding issues. At least I have my bub home, she’s healthy and sometimes, for rare glimpses of time, she’s even a little bit happy.
Sending all my love to little baby Brooklyn. You know who you are.
Here’s a little bit of Pebble from this week….
Look into my eyes…….
Snuggling with mum on the couch (also known as ‘refusing to sleep anywhere but with my mama’).
Chilling on my mamas new breastfeeding pillow (a pressie from my mates Sarah and Dave).