Healthy cupcakes, ya’ll!

UPDATE: here’s the recipe
I love watching Cook Yourself Thin. Right now Lifestyle You is showing the USA series. I loved the UK series more, but this one is good too. A few weeks ago I saw them make these vanilla cupcakes and thought I’d give them a go. There is NO FAT at all in the recipe. They use zucchini instead of butter or oil. Sceptical? You should be!
I’m very happy to report that the cupcakes are delicous. I think I over cooked mine by maybe two minutes, so keep a close eye on them. But they were reasonably moist and sweet. You could taste the zucchini in the uniced cupcake, but not in the iced cupcake. The almonds give it a nice flavour and texture. I’ll definitely make these again.

I did end up using a random packet of greens butter cream icing that I had floating in my cupboard, instead of making the egg white icing. I wanted to try it, but Pebble was due to wake up and I didn’t want to be up to my elbows in egg whites when she did (of course, she still hasn’t – no complaints!).

Feel good warm and fuzzy

I love this. I have no idea who Caitlin Crosby is, but this video made me smile.

Someone stole my baby

….. and replaced her with an angel!
The clinic on Wednesday was good….. the time at home putting it all into practice has been awesome. For two days and two nights I have had a baby who sleeps for three hours at a time at night and 2+ hours at a time during the day! In her bassinet!!!
We still had the crazy screaming inconsolable baby from 6pm – 9pm last night (not continuous screaming, more in waves). But from what I understand about these things, that time of night is commonly crazy for little bubs. Hey, if that’s what I gotta put up with then it’s ALL GOOD, BABY!
So,  how did it all happen? The nurses taught me to teach Pebble how to sleep. The steps are:

• TIGHTLY wrap the baby in a large wrap (as big as a cot sheet!)
• put the baby in the cot when they are calm (or bassinet)
• create a ‘seatbelt’ of fabric by folding up another wrap/bassinette sheet/cot sheet so that it is about 10cm wide and long enough to tuck under each side of the mattress. Tuck it under one side of the mattress, pull over bub’s middle, and tuck under the other side of the mattress so that bub’s weight is holding it down.
• tuck in any other blankets if you need them (not so much in the warm weather)
• if bub is distracted by your face, use another wrap to block her view of you (I peg a wrap to the bassinette handles while rocking, then move it while she’s sleeping just in case it accidentally falls over her face).
• now ROCK! like there’s not tomorrow. It’s pretty important that the bed have wheels for this part. A jerky movement is good.
• as bub starts to drift off to sleep slow down the rocking until you’re completely stopped.
• if bub wakes up, start with big rocking again, and slowly withdraw the rocking as she sleeps. Keep returning and trying to resettle every time she wakes.

Easy, right? Well, kind of.
The first time we did this at the clinic Pebble SCREAMED! She screamed longer and harder than she ever had before, so much that it brought me to tears. It may have been only a few minutes, no more than five, of this intense screaming, but …… I just can’t describe the feeling that it gave me. It has horrifying.
Just as I was at breaking point, and ready to pick her up and give her a cuddle, her cries got a little quieter and a peaceful look came over her face. Over the next 20 mins, her eyes got smaller and smaller until they were completely closed. Sure, I had to go back to resettle her twice, and when she woke after an hour and a half I promptly picked her up for cuddles. But she slept! Away from me!
The second sleep time at the clinic, Pebble settled much more quickly, with no big screaming at all. Just a little cry, then the same peaceful look, and she was off. Again, some resettling was needed, but that time she slept so long I had to wake her up so we could go home!
That night I got 7 hours of sleep (4 + 3 + 1) and she got even more (I got up to shower and have breakfast). During the day she had two 2.5 hour naps. Last night she had two three hour sleeps and a two hour sleep, and has been sleeping for 2.5 hours so far today.
I think we’re lucky that it worked so quickly for us. I imagined coming home to at least a week of screaming nights, but Pebble seems so relieved that her mummy has finally learned to help her sleep properly. She is feeding so much better too, I think because she finally has the energy to suck properly for a longer time.
Here is my sleeping angel amongst my arsenal of sleep weapons (I still use ‘Wooshy’ the bear that makes womb sounds, and a CD of baby lullabies).

Hopefully this pattern continues…….. hope I didn’t jinx it by putting it all out there! LOL I’m a little bit superstitious sometimes……

Dude, you better be sleepin!

This is how I check to see if Pebble is sleeping. With covert surveillance! Loathe to move her in case she is not yet quite asleep, and then disturb her, I sneak up from behind. I love my expression in this pic. There’s something of a threat in my eye . Or just plain desperation, perhaps.
The only way I can get to my computer keyboard to write more than a sentence, is to stand at the kitchen bench in front of the lap top, with little Pebble in the sling. Except, of course, for the rare times that she does sleep away from my body during the day, and if that happens you can be DAMN sure I’ll be sleeping too.
Don’t get me wrong here. My heart is full of love for this little bundle, and I lap up the cuddles as much as I can, because before too long she’ll be oh so big and I’ll wonder where my baby went.
Tomorrow the two of us are headed off to the local Child and Youth Heath office for some observation and hopefully some support with feeding and settling. We are still struggling with breast feeding. Sometimes it’s awesome, and sometimes Pebble is all about the screaming and frustration and pulling away. I’ve no idea why this happens, I can’t see a pattern to it, but it’s distressing for both of us. We’re still using formula top ups at night, to make sure that I get more than a half hours sleep at a time.
Still, things could be worse. My heart goes out to my friend who’s little girl is less than a week old and has had to return to hospital to sort out some real feeding issues. At least I have my bub home, she’s healthy and sometimes, for rare glimpses of time, she’s even a little bit happy.
Sending all my love to little baby Brooklyn. You know who you are.
Here’s a little bit of Pebble from this week….
 
Look into my eyes…….
 
Snuggling with mum on the couch (also known as ‘refusing to sleep anywhere but with my mama’).

Chilling on my mamas new breastfeeding pillow (a pressie from my mates Sarah and Dave).

dreaming...

This kid cracks me up and freaks me out at the same time with her little sleep facials!

Pebble – 1 month

My baby (OMG y’all, I have a baby!) is four weeks old already. Paul, Pebble and I are all very much still adjusting to life with our little “Pebble” in the outside world. Turns out that babies are a lot of hard work. Who knew?
Pebble is already letting us know who she is, and here are a few of her favourite things:

• boobs – she eats a lot. Every two hours lately, sometimes more! Meanwhile, I’ve learned to do a lot with one hand, including writing this blog and ordering groceries online.
• cuddles – who doesn’t, right? In the past week Pebble has shown that she likes cuddles SO much that she won’t sleep during the day unless held or in the sling. Awesome.
• eating sleeping and shitting at the same time. I really hope she grows out of this one.
• stretching – watch.

• chewing her fist. I wrap Pebble for sleeping and cuddles, but no matter what she ALWAYS manages to get her right arm out and sucks on her fist. The sound of her lip smacking sucks are what wakes me up to let me know it’s boob time. I’m still amazed that this sound is all it takes to wake me. Talk about mummy radar!
• the mobile above her change table. In the last week she has really started having long interested looks at this.
• baths – just don’t try to get her OUT of the bath. I’m sure the neighbours think I’m killing her.

This is how we roll...

Pebble is really not being an independant woman right now. Fair enough too, she is only 3 weeks and 6 days old! She loves snuggles for day time sleeps. Perhaps I'm making a rod for my own back, as they say, but this is how we cope to keep sane. Couch + Pebble + Mummy = sleep.

At least she manages a few hours on her own at night. Strange but true. Anyone else have this experience? Google tells me that it's quite common.

Jam Crumble Slice

Pebble isnt sleeping longer than an hour unless held or in the sling. But I was determined to do something fun today to remind me of my old self. So I baked!
I found this recipe in a Symply Too Good To Be True cookbook and had all ingredients on hand. Its in the oven and I feel a little more human again.

Mmmm milk drunk

Hello all, thanks for ur lovely messages. We are hanging in there. Here is the Little Miss in a drunken haze. Ain't she sweet?

milk

I have really been missing this blogging stuff. So what have I been doing instead? Well yesterday I demand fed Pebble 8 times in 8 hours. When I wasnt doing that I was expressing or cuddling the little darling to sleep. This is all working towards successful and simple breast feeding. I hope to join the world outside my lounge room soon. For now the cuddles make it all worth it.