Defeat

3.19am

Two hours of kicking and (gentle, loving) hair pulling.

I am defeated.

You win, kid. This time.

Time for a cuppa.

It’s a long story…

The short of it: Pebble just went to bed in her cot, on her own, in 5 minutes.

The longer story?

It all began with Pebble spending the early hours of every morning in our bed, which just wasn’t working for everyone’s best nights sleep. It moved on to me sleeping in a single bed in Pebble’s room next to the cot. Which moved on to me sleeping in my own bed (for one night) before the standing up and crying started (Pebble’s, not mine). She stood up. I lay her back down. She stood up. I lay her back down. She stood up. I lay her back down. In between all that there was the ‘throwing the dummy out the cot and watching Mummy pick it up’ trick'. Fast forward two hours (12am to 2am) when she finally collapsed into sleep and I lay in the dark plotting my next move.

The single bed in Pebble’s room had been the Child Youth Health nurse’s suggestion, so I rang them again to find out what they suggested next. The answer: ignore her. Ignore her unless she is actually crying. Not whinging, not playing, but crying.

So, I tried that, and it worked quite well. I stayed in the same room but ignored all her attempts to get my attention. Things improved swiftly over a number of nights, until I was back in my own bed again all night last night. Pebble. Slept. Through.

REPEAT: Pebble Slept Through The Night.

Huzzah!

Oh wait. No huzzah. Retracted huzzah.

At morning nap time today, following all the usual tired signs, I went through the usual bed time routine and popped Pebble in her cot. One. Hour. And. Much. Hysterical. Sobbing. Later. she slept.

I rang my trusty nurses again to get reassurance that I’m not an ogre of a mother, that Pebble will not hate me forever, and that she needs my persistence and consistency, and I prepared myself for the arvo nap.

So here we are. Back to the five minutes to sleep. I popped her in bed, said Goodnight I Love You and with one little grizzle (hers)and a sideways glance (mine), she went to sleep.

I’m not counting my chickens or anything but, gosh, was that ever nice! For her and for me.

Wish us luck for bed time tonight!

At My House: Rods and Backs

So, I have discovered the secret to getting a baby to sleep past 6am…… are you ready?……
Let them sleep in your bed!!!
Three times in the last week I’ve brought Pebble into our room after an early morning feed. At 5.00am if I put her back in her cot she will just decide it’s morning and want to get up and play. So I tried bringing her back to bed with me and hey presto she slept in until 8.00am! Yesterday it was until 8.15am and only because I woke her up!
It was very cute seeing her wake up next to us, her little smile and legs kicking with delight when she saw us. BUT. Am I making a rod for my own back here? Am I going to end up regretting this little morning cuddle? I wouldn’t mind if she wants to come into our bed in the early hours, but I don’t want it to become an all night thing, or for her to refuse to sleep in her cot.
What is your experience with letting littlies sleep in the parents bed? Pros, cons?
What’s happening at your house this week?

Through. The. Night.

Like some friends of mine, I am worried about saying this out loud but ….Pebble slept Through The Night last night! I SO badly needed it too, it was perfect timing. I don’t want to get my hopes up about a repeat performance…. but I can’t help it just a little bit!
I’ve been hearing of other babes doing this for ages, some since eight weeks old! I haven’t wanted to push Pebble or dramatically change her routine to encourage sleeping through, as I believe that she is a very active and hungry baby, and has needed the food.
Since starting solids I’ve been hoping, waiting, for that elusive sleep through. It’s been about a month now, with three meals a day (did I tell you? It’s going really well!). Still, I’ve been getting up at least once a night, sometimes twice. Not to mention the catnapping. No big day sleeps for this busy babe! I know, it could be a lot worse.
Perhaps Pebble felt the threat of that famous book Save Our Sleep that I was researching last night. I downloaded the set of documents for her age group for a mere $6. It has been an interesting read so far, and I will adopt some parts of it, but not all.
In any case, I will take that SEVEN HOURS STRAIGHT sleep that I enjoyed last night, and run with it. Whatever will be, will be.
How much sleep did you get last night?

Girl’s Night In

Last night Pebble and I had a girl’s night in. Paul was off helping my sister and her family move from one teeny weeny country town to a much larger (and much further away) country town. I’m sad to see them move further away, but I know that they’re doing what is right for their family. Not to mention all the fun family holidays we can plan that can create memories for the little girl cousins in the future!
So, I had BIG plans for our evening. Pebble went to bed at 7pm, I had a yummy curried sweet potato soup for dinner, followed by a gold magnum for dessert (naughty!). I blogged and watched Jamie's New Food Revolution. Then I went to bed, stretching out across the whole bed, at 8.30pm.
Heaven.
It could have been a little bit more heavenly if I hadn’t been woken at 12pm and 2am, but at least I got to sleep in until 6.30am. Yes, that counts as a sleep in around these parts.
Some might think it sad that this was a fabulous night for me, but I’m happy with my lot. More than happy.
I hope you’re having a heavenly start to your weekend too.

Tired

Dear Internet,
Did you sleep well last night? I think you must have. Yesterday, when I said that I’d love to give you just a little of the sleep I’m having, ya’ll went ahead and accepted my offer, right? Because last night was the worst nights sleep I’ve had since we were in newborn town.
I got into bed at 10ish, expecting not to wake up again to feed Pebble until at least 2am, perhaps 3am, maybe even 4am…
10.30pm –  baby awake
1.00am – baby awake
4.00am – baby awake
5.50am – baby awake
She wasn’t upset, or hungry (except for the first feed). Just awake.
At quarter past six she came into bed with us. Of course, I couldn’t sleep for a while, I was so acutely aware of her little body and tiny puffs of breath.
So, I’m a little tired today. I hope you enjoyed the sleep that I sent you :)

Pinch and a Punch…

First day of the month!
It’s JULY already. JULY! Where is this year going?
This time last year I was counting down the days until our wedding, and counting up the weeks until we could safely say that I was pregnant. I was exactly twelve weeks pregnant on our wedding day on 11 July 2009, which I think is just lovely.
This morning I staggered into the kitchen to find it filled with pink light from this pretty sunrise. Pebble had slept past 5.00am for the first time this week and the world looks a little more beautiful when you’re not as sleep deprived.

I hope you had a good (or better) nights sleep and find something beautiful in your world today.

Ch-ch-ch-changes

It’s amazing the difference a week can make in the life of a 3 month old baby.
So far this week Pebble has had her first night in her cot. And in two days I’ve gone from rocking to almost-sleep to almost-self-settling.

Fingers crossed that things keep going well, but right now the routine means gro-bag + light wrap for the arms (she keeps flailing them) + music night light + dummy. Perhaps a little jiggle from my hand on her chest as she lays in the cot, but that is needed less and less.

Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t all easy breezy. The first time I tried this it took 30 mins. Now I’m down to about 2 mins.
Yesterday I got another awesome milestone – her first proper giggles. Of course I tried to capture it on video, but she wouldn’t quite do it again. I ended up with a video of the ceiling and some little giggle sounds (as well as the ridiculous noise that I made to get her to giggle the first time). Perhaps it will make you giggle….

She’s growing up

Pebble is getting sooooooo loooooooooong. She is off the charts when it comes to her length, and the bassinette is getting very crowded. I want to start putting her in the cot instead, but first I’d like to get her used to sleeping in a gro-bag. Now that she’s starting to roll, I don’t really want to keep her wrapped and in the big cot, in case she rolls on to her face and can’t get back over.

Today I am trying out the gro-bag when she has her daytime naps, and so far she’s sleeping well. It is ridiculously big on her, because it’s size 6 –18 months. I bought two identical gro-bags from a friend before Pebble was born (wish I’d gotten the pink ones now ;P). Oh well, there’s nothing wrong with sleeping with bugs all over her, is there?
  

5am.

Not sweating the small stuff is a lot easier when you’re getting plenty of sleep. When you’re not, sleep is BIG stuff.

Noted.

Don’t sweat the small stuff

This is one of my favourite sayings, but one I find hard to implement.
Around these parts we’ve been battling with sleep. There has been clinics and books, noise and no noise, wrapping and no wrapping, rocking and no rocking.
On Monday night Pebble and I slept over at my mum’s. On arrival I was faced with an unmoving cot, feet firmly planted in the carpet. A cot that DIDN’T ROCK. I hadn’t thought about it before hand, and there seemed little point in thinking too much about after the fact. Just do it. Let it go.
The room was dark as pitch. I just put her in the cot, tucked her in, and went to bed (right along side). She made a whole lotta grunting, groaning, heavy breathing, squeaking. But she slept. And so did I.
Repeat x 2 during the night for feeds and we’re both a lot more relaxed. Ok, I’m a lot more relaxed. I tried it again last night at home. Plop, tuck, walk away. No hovering by the cot for at least 5 mins, just in case. No springing from the bed at every squeak, just in case.
Note to self: Small stuff. Don’t sweat it.

Let’s wrap it up

An update on my saga with wrapping little Pebble   - I’ve met her halfway with a loose wrap. Now she is wriggling and grunting much less, and often gets her hands free by morning, but doesn’t wake herself up with flailing limbs. It’s working for now, and that’s the real trick with this baby business. Everything is ‘for now’. And we just go with the flow.
Thanks so much for your comments on your experiences with wrapping, I love to hear your stories.
Meanwhile – look how she’s grown!
 
Don’t forget, it you’d like to keep up with my blog via facebook, you can visit the Rockgarden page and become a fan.

And, that’s a wrap

Pebble loves to be swaddled….. I think. Recently she’s been grunting and fighting her wrap in the early hours of the morning, and I started to question whether I was doing the right thing by wrapping her. But, ridiculously, I’ve been too scared NOT to wrap her. I worry that she won’t sleep.
So, after being inspired yet again by this lovely lady, I decided to give it a go. After all, what’s the worst that could happen? The result……..?


The story doesn’t end here, however. I tried again at the next nap, but no way was that bubba going to sleep. So, I wrapped her and – BOOM - instant sleep!
I will keep experimenting with wrapping and not wrapping.
If you’ve had experience with baby wrapping, how long did you do it for? And how did you transition to no wrap?

In the swing

Pebble and I are getting the hang of this mum and baby business. I think a lot of the changes in the last week come down to me relaxing more. It’s easy enough to tell someone to relax, take it easy, don’t worry….. I’ve been telling myself that for weeks already! But only in the last week, or even the last few days, have I really been able to do it.
Pebble has become more predictable. There’s not a real routine, but I am more able to know how to respond to her needs, and handle whatever she has to throw at me :)
I am also allowing myself to relax about the fact that she is going to cry in the car. This will not kill her. In fact, it helped clear her little nose of boogers yesterday, the poor little mite was crying so hard. It still breaks my heart a little to hear it, but it doesn’t stop me from going out anymore.
So far this week I have gone to my mum’s for dinner with Paul (an hour away), gone shopping for hours with Paul’s mum, and yesterday I took Pebble to the doctors, the supermarket, and the library ALL BY MYSELF. Tonight Pebble and I are heading to my Dad’s for dinner (an hour away), and we’ll be just fine.
It helps that my milk supply seems a little better, but also I’m just not stressing about that so much anymore either. If she’s crying and I don’t seem able to satisfy her needs with breast milk, I can give her a small top up of formula. There is no need for either of us to be stressed by this situation any more.
Of course, key to all of this is some  predictability around night time and sleep. We almost always do the 7.30 – 8.00ish feed, followed by a nice long bath, then another attempt at feeding and a small bottle at around 9pm. Then a cuddle and Daddy rocks Pebble to sleep while I hit the hay. I usually either get woken, or wake Pebble up, around 1am or 2am for a feed and she usually goes straight back down to sleep.
As long as I get this little bit of sleep, I can cope! After that it’s a little bit more all over the place. Sometimes she’ll wake for a feed one or two hours later and sometimes she’ll even go down for another little two hour sleep after the next feed.
This is our usual right now. I know this will change again as Pebble changes, but right now it’s working and I’ll enjoy it.

Someone stole my baby

….. and replaced her with an angel!
The clinic on Wednesday was good….. the time at home putting it all into practice has been awesome. For two days and two nights I have had a baby who sleeps for three hours at a time at night and 2+ hours at a time during the day! In her bassinet!!!
We still had the crazy screaming inconsolable baby from 6pm – 9pm last night (not continuous screaming, more in waves). But from what I understand about these things, that time of night is commonly crazy for little bubs. Hey, if that’s what I gotta put up with then it’s ALL GOOD, BABY!
So,  how did it all happen? The nurses taught me to teach Pebble how to sleep. The steps are:

• TIGHTLY wrap the baby in a large wrap (as big as a cot sheet!)
• put the baby in the cot when they are calm (or bassinet)
• create a ‘seatbelt’ of fabric by folding up another wrap/bassinette sheet/cot sheet so that it is about 10cm wide and long enough to tuck under each side of the mattress. Tuck it under one side of the mattress, pull over bub’s middle, and tuck under the other side of the mattress so that bub’s weight is holding it down.
• tuck in any other blankets if you need them (not so much in the warm weather)
• if bub is distracted by your face, use another wrap to block her view of you (I peg a wrap to the bassinette handles while rocking, then move it while she’s sleeping just in case it accidentally falls over her face).
• now ROCK! like there’s not tomorrow. It’s pretty important that the bed have wheels for this part. A jerky movement is good.
• as bub starts to drift off to sleep slow down the rocking until you’re completely stopped.
• if bub wakes up, start with big rocking again, and slowly withdraw the rocking as she sleeps. Keep returning and trying to resettle every time she wakes.

Easy, right? Well, kind of.
The first time we did this at the clinic Pebble SCREAMED! She screamed longer and harder than she ever had before, so much that it brought me to tears. It may have been only a few minutes, no more than five, of this intense screaming, but …… I just can’t describe the feeling that it gave me. It has horrifying.
Just as I was at breaking point, and ready to pick her up and give her a cuddle, her cries got a little quieter and a peaceful look came over her face. Over the next 20 mins, her eyes got smaller and smaller until they were completely closed. Sure, I had to go back to resettle her twice, and when she woke after an hour and a half I promptly picked her up for cuddles. But she slept! Away from me!
The second sleep time at the clinic, Pebble settled much more quickly, with no big screaming at all. Just a little cry, then the same peaceful look, and she was off. Again, some resettling was needed, but that time she slept so long I had to wake her up so we could go home!
That night I got 7 hours of sleep (4 + 3 + 1) and she got even more (I got up to shower and have breakfast). During the day she had two 2.5 hour naps. Last night she had two three hour sleeps and a two hour sleep, and has been sleeping for 2.5 hours so far today.
I think we’re lucky that it worked so quickly for us. I imagined coming home to at least a week of screaming nights, but Pebble seems so relieved that her mummy has finally learned to help her sleep properly. She is feeding so much better too, I think because she finally has the energy to suck properly for a longer time.
Here is my sleeping angel amongst my arsenal of sleep weapons (I still use ‘Wooshy’ the bear that makes womb sounds, and a CD of baby lullabies).

Hopefully this pattern continues…….. hope I didn’t jinx it by putting it all out there! LOL I’m a little bit superstitious sometimes……